No red? You’re dead.

Well. Called tech support and, after 55 minutes, was told that if I don’t have three red lights, I have to pay $99 for an out-of-warranty repair. This is not what Microsoft said last year, stating that any 2005-made units (like mine) would be repaired for free, without specifying what caused the problem. My tech support guy “didn’t have that information yet” and said he can’t help me until I get three red lights. Mind you, that information was released 11 months ago. But as you can imagine, my word against whatever info is accessible to the call support database…my word doesn’t stand a chance. But I’m not paying $99.

So. I can’t get help because my freezing, glitching, unplayable Xbox is not currently displaying three red rings. It’s very close to that, but it’s not there yet. So I’m in limbo until it totally fails…or I just tell them that it’s failed.

I did not identify myself as a member of the press (this is the 360 I camped out for and paid for with my own money; I’m just another consumer), but I’m glad I recorded the call. It will be good to have as reference as this develops.

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Uh oh

This, I believe, is a bad sign:

I was all excited about the BioShock demo, so I turned on my 360, started the download, and…that’s what I got. Last time I saw that on a retail unit, it was terminal and the machine had to be shipped back for replacement.

My incept date is 10/27/2005 — a launch-day unit that I truly struggled to obtain — so I’ve always been nervous that it would conk out. I’m still in the denial phase, the “it’s just not feeling well, I’ll shoot it with compressed air like, a lot, and everything will be fine in the morning” stage.

However, when I went to register my console at Xbox.com in the likely case I do have to send it in, I got “A problem occurred, and your request cannot be completed” in large, unfriendly letters. If that’s not a harbinger of doom, what is?

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I’m disappointed in all of you.

I wanted to wait at least a year before bringing this up. Isn’t anybody going to take the bait?

Posted in Puzzles | 7 Comments

Freddie King

Goddamn.

(Thanks to HotRats at RRC for the heads-up.)

Posted in Guitar, Music | 2 Comments

California Extreme 2007 rocks

It’s a very good show this year. I mean, it’s always a good show, but I really had a blast this year, played a lot of games that you simply can’t find anywhere else or enjoy in their original incarnations. Tempest is not fun unless you’re playing the color vector version with the analog spinner, and the volume up rather high– the way God (or at least Dave Theurer) intended. Mad Planets is another one of those “original or nothing” beasts. And I literally got a blister from playing The Grid, Ed Boon’s 6-player deathmatch game that never came out for any home systems. XBLA would be perfect for it…

I was also stoked because for the first time they had a trivia contest, much like World Series of Pop Culture but several magnitudes geekier. Everybody I’d hoped to meet and play with had not arrived, so I joined up with two other mercenaries looking for a team and we formed…The Mercenaries. Mike was a pinball expert, Thomas was a vid guy, and I thought I straddled the line, leaning toward vid. Well, I wound up answering (or not answering) the pinball questions, and Mike wound up getting stuck with vids — so we lost quickly (but not as quickly as the team that had shirts printed up). But it was great to be among my people.

Every year, I see something I’ve never seen before or play a game I’ve never played. This year, two weird ones caught my eye. First is UltraPin, a digital pinball emulator. Basically, it’s a MAME machine with flippers, and a giant HDTV installed on its end, with a rendered, forced-perspective playfield. Pretty weird, and not as realistic as I’d hoped. I love pinball but don’t have the mechanical skills to maintain a machine, so I was kind of hoping this would kick ass. But it doesn’t, at least not yet. I could never get used to the playfield’s perspective, could never find the sweet spot to make it look real. I kept moving closer, or stooping down, figuring there is an optimal viewing angle and I just had to try to find it. Anyway, here’s a cellphone pic:

The other oddity was a hack of Tapper that changes the bartender to Moe and all the patrons to Simpsons characters. And the bandit that shakes up the beers for the bonus round? Bart, of course. A quick pic from the attract mode:

California Extreme continues tomorrow and you can buy one-day admission on site at the Tech Museum (Parkside Hall) in downtown San Jose. If you’re around these parts, please go and support the cause (and have fun). This is a total fan-based labor of love and a crucial part of geek history.

Posted in Games, Geek | 5 Comments

Escape from LA

This is the second time LAX simply didn’t want me to leave. 8:40am flight, cancelled, found out as I was checking in at 7:49 that I was booked on a 7:49 flight instead. Went on standby on a noon. Noon flight cancelled. Ticketed on 2:49pm flight. That plane arrived late, then had mechanical problems. Then problems with the paperwork about the mechanical problems. At 5pm, we finally took off.

Eight hours in LAX. What have I done to you, universe?

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Fast Times @ Great American Music Hall

Oh yes. As recently mentioned, we’ve been invited to share the esteemed Great American Music Hall stage with Sing Blue Silver (a Duran Duran tribute from members of Stung and For the Masses) and Japanese Baby (a tribute to the Cure). It’s coming up soon — Friday, August 24, doors open at 8pm and show starts at 9. It’s an all-ages show; tickets are $12 in advance and $15 at the door.

(Go ahead and click it for a big PDF of Kat’s amusingly subversive flyer, suitable for printing and posting at your place of business/den of leisure/house of worship)

I will inevitably bother you about this again. This is a big deal for us.

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Watchmen

My mom didn’t like comic books — too much violence, she reasoned — so no Superman or X-Men for me. Occasionally, Archie or, if I was lucky, Scrooge McDuck Adventures. Sigh. But, to her credit, I only climbed up on the roof a few times, and never to try to fly.

Watchmen is why I read comics, the graphic novel lovingly shoved down my throat by high school pal (now big-shot character animator) Ethan Hurd. He kept going on about how good it was and how I should read it, and I always resisted (if you want to make sure I will never see a movie or read a book or listen to an album, tell me repeatedly that I have to, or react with horrified shock that I haven’t yet seen/read/listened to it). For Christmas one year, he finally gave me the paperback, along with a Clapton CD. “I got you two gifts, one you’ll like and one you won’t.” But he got it backwards. I wound up falling deeply in love with Watchmen and finally understanding what he was on about. The narrative depth, the characters, the subtexts…it’s just a masterpiece that happens to take place in the realm of funnybooks. Now I’m the one shoving it down people’s throats. (Oh, and the Clapton CD was good too, but I already had it.)

I’ve been collecting tidbits of trivia, alternate editions, and promotional items over the years — I have some of the portfolio prints framed in my house — and even have a hard copy of the horrible movie script Sam Hamm penned back in the early 90s, where it starts with the destruction of the Statue of Liberty (?) and ends with an alternate dimension crossover. Utter shit! Kat and I did the first issue of Watchmen as a radio drama in college as a class project and always wanted to complete it. But when we built it, we realized…the comic itself is a brilliantly conceived storyboard. How could any screenwriter screw that up?

So, now armed with a much better script from David (X-Men) Hayter and 300 director Zack Snyder at the helm, they’ve announced the core cast for the 2009 movie version of Watchmen. My only reaction is…who? Tom Cruise and Keanu Reeves have apparently both turned it down, but we have Jackie Earle Haley confirmed as Rorschach. Okay, that’s cool, and as some have pointed out, semi-anonymous but with serious acting chops is what that character needs. And in truth, I don’t really want names; I want actors. But everybody else is an unrecognizable starlet working their way up; will they have the chops? Maybe that’s how you get stars, by taking risks, or maybe this is how you save money in effects movies, by hiring n00bs. I’ve got that old fear of the unknown.

Oh god…I’m officially one of those “those people” obsessing over a comic book movie that won’t be out for two more years, hoping that something that I hold dear won’t be screwed up in its inevitable Hollywood translation.

But I’m determined, and you can hold me to this: I can be happy! I do believe a good movie version of Watchmen can be made, just like LotR picked and chose the right battles and even the Harry Potter films have, overall, hit the right balance. If it sucks, I’ll be sad, and I’ll always have the book. But if it’s good, I’ll be thrilled.

Posted in Geek, Movies & TV | 11 Comments

Getcher hands offa mah woman

We played a private gig last night, our first with the new drummer and bassist. (McFly and Chewie both had too many time demands and needed to reclaim their lives.) Musically, it went really well — a little sloppy as expected, and I forgot some lyrics — but generally a great party vibe overall. The new rhythm section really brings a different feel to the band — it’s a lot looser and more energetic. We’re also playing some old songs that we haven’t done for literally years and adding new songs that we’ve wanted to do for a while. Hopefully you’ll come check us out yourself when we play Great American Music Hall August 24th, or maybe Cache Creek in early September. Get your tickets (or your hotel rooms) early!

I prefer the casino and local nightclub gigs to the private stuff. Last night’s private show was rough because the partygoers simply didn’t want to hear us. Three hours of rock, roaming the crowd with wireless mics, choreography, big hit songs — literally, no reaction, as if the radio was playing. It happens; you just do your best to give ’em what they paid for anyway. But at the end of the night, they were tipsy enough to dance. When we refused to play after the 10pm sound ordiance, the drunk guys in attendance hatched a cunning plan: We’ll steal their instruments and keep on rockin’ as soon as they leave the stage! Kat was on guard as our sound engineer, so she thwarted the public debut of Chester and the Molesters.

Those of you who know me know that I take my guitar nonsense seriously; I’m a firm believer that some guitars “fit” some people, and there’s an emotional bond between player and instrument. I don’t think you can do your best — no matter how bad your best may be — unless you feel that connection. So a drunk guy thinking it’s time to play Guitar Hero II with my precious Lammy is pretty offensive.

Just to drive the analogy home, I considered fucking his girlfriend the next time he wasn’t looking directly at her, but I figured that would be seen as unprofessional.

Posted in Fast Times | 4 Comments

California Extreme 2007 – Aug 11

It’s next weekend. Tickets are available now, and there’s usually a long line on-site, so it’s definitely better to preorder and pick up at will-call.

Several hundred coin-ops and pinball machines on free play (including several prototypes and rarities), plus competitions, workshops, film screenings, vendors, auctions…if you are a gamer and you are in the Bay Area, attendance is mandatory. It really is the high point of my summer every year.

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